Just lock it
I always thought that honesty and openness are the values that keep relationships alive. That's why I prefered to tell people my true opinion instead of lying and acting. Now I'm starting to doubt that.. Sometimes it's simply superfluous to say what you think and feel.. The shady side of that is: You start keeping everything to yourself and some kind of balloon inside of you begins to be filled. The more you're quiet the more the balloon gets blown up. And now we get to the dangerous part: There's a so called ''explosion-point''. Psychologically this explosion can have two results:
- You'll kick this person out of your life without giving any reasons because you're so fed up with the whole situation.
- You get so mad that you let everything out and by then this person will be forced to face a wave of anger.
Now, I'm asking myself: What's better? There are two options:
- Either I go straightforward to this person and tell her what I really think of what she's doing
- Or I keep this silence till I explode.
So, let's see what will happen first...
8 comments:
Well I think you should go with the first solution: Talk bout it! Don't just keep it and then break the contact completely ... which you did once and it wasn't good for both parties ... talking bout it .. without blaming... without making each other feel guilty .. this is the way to do it .. and keep calm! :D
I guess you are right.
But what if she reacted in such a cold way?
Then I'm gonna explode anyway..
Still calm.. but for how long? =D
hey nadia..actually wouldn comment unless u've asked me..coz i think u know my opinion.well smtimes it's wise nt to b honest.There is smthing smart ppl do in this case:they dont do anything,neither being hypocritical abt it nor being dishonest.i wd say it depends on the person u'r dealing with.sm ppl (u know who btw) don't accept it when any1(even their friends) criticize them..so it's better nt to b honest.or u should choose the ryt time to open the subject.Coz sooner or later it's a problem u'll have to fix one day or the other.Y3ni i prefer being honest,bt i wd think of the ryt time as i told u,in order to avoid missunderstandings.that's it..gd luck with ur blog..cya
Honestly I'm not very good at acting normal or neutral after getting disgusted with someone's behaviour.
It leads me to being careless and cold.
That would definitely affect the relationship (negatively, of course) .
well i agree with both gassia and nada, of course it's better to tell the truth (dependin on who yr talkin about), but then again without makin each other feel guilty or blaming one-another, since that would lead to a fight or anger.. but sometimes (dependin on the subject and person) it might be better to just keep it to yourself and try to forget about it, if you know it's just gonna lead to hurt and pain.. because trust me, i know what it's like to keep too much in, but.. yeah.. so.. that's my opinion, i guess..
Ok then..
To avoid anger and pain I think I'll just keep everything to myself and see what the consequences will be..
If it ended in disaster I will make you responsible for that :P
y? we're just givin you advise.. it's always YOUR decision at the end! so.. it's not our fault :(
e7m .. weird that nadia is asking such a question although one could really think she already has her mind settled about that matter anyways. Everybody is used to the beg7a Nadia, it almost seems easier for her to be like that. Of course the irony comes from the fact that she takes honest tarya22a in an afsh way, or relates it to karaama and regards it as tahzee2. She wants to set the limits in "being honest" 3and everyone equally as HER limits, cause that's what she regards as being respected. Now will she be able to limit everybody's literal way of critisizing to the boundries that fit her?
Anyways, My personal technique was always: If u care to reach the other person, ehbesh feeh 3ala tool, don't fear that he yez3al, let him yez3al mennak, but do the thing in the slick way that would let him think about ur point..
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